Childhood dream Toxic Crusaders beat 'em up...

[Nickokapo]

Hello,
since i was like 12-13 years old, i loved toxic crusaders, freeware, and fanmade games...in the early 2000's, games like bloodlust software's executioners...games made with klik n play, click and create...multimedia fusion...90's shareware....80's abandonware...newgrounds games...
I've always wanted to make my own games, but i am not very intelligent (i've a legal disabilty by a clinical professional who deemed me with "mild mental retardation" and "behavioural deterioration of a non specified grade", this further killed my self-esteem and deepened my depression because....well, the word "retardation" itself makes me feel like i'm...you know...
Anyway, this caused me to not be able to grasp much in terms of coding, programming and being patient, or able to keep a normal attention span.
Therefore, i could never pick up this hobby, even though years later, engines like mugen, openbor and adventure game studio made it possible to make fangames of my 3 favorite genres....
Now the official Toxic Crusaders beat 'em up is coming out...
I wonder if i should try again. Do you have any tips, tricks or advice?
Thanks...game making used to be my childhood dream.

 

[DCurrent]

Hello,
since i was like 12-13 years old, i loved toxic crusaders, freeware, and fanmade games...in the early 2000's, games like bloodlust software's executioners...games made with klik n play, click and create...multimedia fusion...90's shareware....80's abandonware...newgrounds games...
I've always wanted to make my own games, but i am not very intelligent (i've a legal disabilty by a clinical professional who deemed me with "mild mental retardation" and "behavioural deterioration of a non specified grade", this further killed my self-esteem and deepened my depression because....well, the word "retardation" itself makes me feel like i'm...you know...
Anyway, this caused me to not be able to grasp much in terms of coding, programming and being patient, or able to keep a normal attention span.
Therefore, i could never pick up this hobby, even though years later, engines like mugen, openbor and adventure game studio made it possible to make fangames of my 3 favorite genres....
Now the official Toxic Crusaders beat 'em up is coming out...
I wonder if i should try again. Do you have any tips, tricks or advice?
Thanks...game making used to be my childhood dream.

I was diagnosed with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder way before it was in style to be "ADHD". There's also a really good chance I'm sitting on the high functioning Autism spectrum, though that's never been professionally evaluated. I couldn't read a social cue to save my life and still can't. I was ranked in the upper 240's out of 260 from my high school class (lord only knows what those other 15 guys were doing), and spent a lot of my formative years accomplishing jack spit. Among other things, failed out of my hometown college in two semesters. No drugs, no drinking, and no parties... so I can't even use that as an excuse. I just didn't get it done.

-- I now have Bachelor of Arts and Master of Science degrees from the University of Kentucky with a 4.0 GPA, and I'm hoping to obtain a PHD in the next decade. I make my living at said university as Technology Officer for the Environmental Health and Safety unit and sit on two AI research committees.

When I first joined this community? I was banned in two days flat.

-- Now I'm the lead developer and run the primary support forum.

The point isn't to fall heavy into survivorship bias or bore you with my biography, but to give one example that despite shortcomings and/or mistakes, you very much CAN do those things if you stick your nose in it and don't give up. Step 0 is stop telling yourself you can't. Step 1 is ask questions - not "if", but "how".

Just my opinion, for whatever it's worth.
DC

 

[kimono]

Don't let an IQ test or a psychological diagnosis define you: they are tools for understanding, but they in no way define your entire being.

Don't let your dreams be locked behind a label; give them life; they deserve it. We're all here to provide you with help when you need it.
We are always capable of much more than we think: we become aware of this by taking action step by step and at our own pace.

I'd love to try your game, so give me a chance to play it


And a special message to @DCurrent: everything you've accomplished is fantastic: your journey, this community, the opportunity to be able to dedicate yourself to this incredible software.
I've always wondered how we could attract more developers to this engine: perhaps the games we create are the best showcase for it?